But as quickly as it dawned, the sacred month passed us. We came to realize that Kartik meant more to us than just a month of penetance and extra perseverance. Really, the entire year is in preparation of the next Kartik.
Why?
Because it makes us feel directly in line with the Lord. Every thought and seems magnified. Some feel as if they take leaps and bounds in that special month most dear to Srimati Radharani. The atmosphere feels surcharged with a beautiful hope, and potential energy; potential for spiritual advancement.
Our unified goal is to progress to newer levels with every passing day; to be pure in heart; and ultimately, to be able to please the Divine Couple more, and serve Them whenever and wherever we may be.
Now, in the Spring of 2010, I look back on last Autumn with fond memories. So much has changed. And yet, that same desire remains; a desire to shine and excel in my devotional service. In some ways, I have matured, and in some, I have slipped, but the experiences remain vivid in my heart. It's so easy to get absorbed in mundane work, and put aside the important tasks!
With a jolt, I realize that today* is is the most revered Purusottama Adhika Mas! (*check your local Vaisnava calendar for exact dates.) It is considered especially dear to the Lord, and even more potent that Kartik. It is an extra month of the lunar calendar.
For us, it means an extra opportunity for extra service, for extra spiritual progress!
With a most trying, rigorous schedule, I do not know what I can offer to the Lord in this most sacred month. Yet, I feel I cannot pass this an opportunity like this! At the same time, I realize the seriousness of a vrata. It must not be broken.
If there's one thing I've learnt from ISKCON, its that you shouldn't let important opportunities slip, because they often won't come back and you'll regret your choice forever!
I conclude, simply pledging my surrender unto the Mistress and Master of my heart. I am unfit to offer anything more. I simply beg to remain Their servant, forever more. I am most grateful for their truly unconditional mercy, though I feel most undeserving. Let me simply try my best to serve Them better, for my happiness is in Their pleasure.
Sri Sri Radha Madhava Ki Jay!
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devi duhkha-kula-sagarodare duyamanam ati-durgatam janam
tvam kripa-prabala-naukayadbhutam prapaya sva-pada-pankajalayam
O queen, please rescue this unfortunate person drowning in an ocean of pain. Place him on the strong boat of Your mercy and carry him to the wonderful realm of Your lotus feet.
tavaivasmi tavaivasmi na jivami tvaya vina
iti vijnaya devi tvam naya mama caranantikam
I am Yours! I am Yours! I cannot live without You! O Devi Radha, please understand this and bring me to Your lotus feet.
asha-bharair amrita-sindhu-mayaih kathancit kalo mayati-gamitah kila sampratam hi
tvam cet kripam mayi vidhasyasi naiva kim me pranair vrajena ca varoru bakarinapi
For me somehow the present moment is flooded by a nectar ocean of many hopes. If You do not give Your mercy, then of what use to me are this life, the land of Vraja, and Shri Krishna, the enemy of Baka?
--
(Srila Raghunatha Das Goswami)
